...Because I crave for the attention.* It should be a straightforward answer, like 'because I love to write', 'because I want to share my knowledge, experience, style and taste with others', or -as my mum suggested- 'because I like to put my thoughts and opinions on digital paper'. But, if you did some research like me, these answers are a repetitive selection of answers given when questioning a blogger about its motives.

"We're probably less unique than we thought."

This doesn't mean they are less true, it just means that we're all probably less unique than we thought. That we're literally all in this together. With the same ambitions, goals, perspectives and prospects. Or perhaps it's a sign of generalising our real and personal ambitions into a wider spectrum to be #relatable. OR, if I'm really pushing it, our language system is failing us so we're never able to truly put our thoughts into words as words are actually limiting us in voicing our thoughts. AND THAT'S WHY we all write the same words over and over again.

So it's not my fault I thought starting a blog would be a great way to express my *creativity* and feed my vanity at the same tume, it's the fault of the English language. How dare thy!

*According to my father. Thanks dad. Love you too.

Life's a laugh and death's the joke

As you can read on my FAQ page, I started this blog as a 'distraction' from my grandmothers passing. I was already interested in the blogging world prior to my grand entrée; and sometimes certain buttons need to be pushed to actually mobilise you. Although this weird little world didn't completely offer me the distraction needed, it gave me tools to further explore the things that perhaps could make life just that little bit bearable again.

And now, after a bit more than four years, I'm writing my 500th blogpost. Although this number could've been reached faster if I hadn't taken a four month hiatus. Twice. It's still good to see that number passing your screen trying to think of things to write about. Perhaps one of the reasons I still blog is because I'm trying to find out how many different point of views I can give on one subject. Oh yes, I too have caved in and am trying to become 'niche'.

To reach a small 'goal', like writing 500 good, bad and really bad blogposts, is also a nice incentive for further exploring and milking my old ideas. I can easily recycle now! After 500 posts who knows what has and hasn't passed your screen before?!

"Blogging is also a good way to procrastinate."

Blogging is also a good way to procrastinate but still feel like you're doing something useful with your life. I mean, it's more productive than re-watching the same show you've already seen a thousand times just because you've recently got a Netflix account and feel overwhelmed by all the shows and films you've now got access to so you just stick to what you know as a way to feel secure and safe. It's the same reason you repeatedly listen to a handful of songs on Spotify and never really explore the full potential of the platform. #relatable?

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Passion, personality and parties

I'm not a successful blogger. Perhaps I'm even a bad blogger. If I for instance read about the milestones one-month bloggers achieve which I, a-bit-more-than-four-years blogger, can only dream of, I feel like I failed the craft. And then I wonder what the craft is and if it was meant to be mastered in the first place. And, if it is meant to be mastered, does this implicate I'm indeed failing or if there are exceptions to the rule? Quoting almost every semi-successful blogger: it's not about the numbers, the money or the freebies, it's about passion, personality and parties [or insert here whatever floats your boat].

I'm contemplating what my advice would be as a semi-unsuccessful blogger. Because in some way you start a blog to proof yourself. To show the world that you too are able to write witty and interesting content. It's a vain hobby. Because if you really didn't care if no one is reading your blog, you're simply polluting the internet and I suggest you take up another hobby (or at least invest in a personal paper diary).

Get on with it!

Successful or not: bloggers want to be seen. The scale of preferred coverage may vary, but we all secretely dream of numbers, money and freebies. It's easier to admit it then to hide it. Because there are so many different opportunities these days for us blogger opportunists it's almost unnatural not to be tempted by blogposts giving you tips on how to get more views. Because yes, I passionately work on my blogposts and it's nice to get some sort of acknowledgement for it. Even if it is acknowledged in numbers on Google Analytics of which I'm not sure what they actually mean but generally feel good when they go up.

"I'm not a bitter lost blogger crying herself to sleep at night."

Don't get me wrong. I'm not a bitter lost blogger crying herself to sleep at night wondering why I'm not hitting milestones one-month bloggers easily tick off. Because, I guess, my advice as a semi-unsuccessful blogger is: get up and get over it. And in that way the three p's (passion, personality and parties) do apply. So, at the end of the day there aren't many differences between us 'meh' and them 'yeah'. Except naturally for the numbers, money and freebies. Always the numbers, money and freebies.

Rolling a stone

Basically: you can't always get what you want and I can't get no satisfaction. Seventies rock, the driving force behind every blogger. We all know it. Trying and trying and trying and still not getting what you want. But also knowing that by trying again and again you might find what you need. And then not settling for what you need, because the terms and conditions have turned and twisted to the sound of the beat. Therefore that what you once wanted isn't satisfactory any more.

So why do I keep blogging? I keep blogging because I like it. Because I want to further explore my interests and try to find the right words to voice my findings and opinions. Because I want to reach beyond my bedroom walls and because I think this is just the beginning. Oh how original... Cheers to the next 500!


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